People talk about Runyon Canyon as being an “escape from the city.” Nonsense, I tell you — Runyon is basically a Crunch’s gym with sunlight. I see more Blackberry users there than at Insert Upscale-Beverly-Hills-Restaurant-That-I-Don’t-Go-To Here. If you want a real escape from the city, listen close…

Hidden directly off Los Feliz Blvd, right around the corner where it turns into Western, there’s a hidden woodland oasis that looks like something straight out of J.R.R. Tolkien’s subconscious. I’m talking about a place called Ferndell Park — which, you notice, even has a vaguely Middle Earth-y sounding name. You turn in near the sculpture of the dancing bear, and from here, you follow a densely shaded path, ensconced in California sycamores, winding up along gently trickling streams, past wooden guide-barriers and under stone bridges. The sound of the distant traffic fades out, and is replaced by that of birds, running water, and even — that rarest of LA commodities — silence. And yet you are still only a short walk from snacks.

For short men with hairy feet, i.e. me, this place is a dream come true.

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WHAT: hidden LOTR-esque mini-hike
WHEN: good all year round
WHERE: Ferndell Park
$$$: Free

Along one of LA’s ugliest streets — a soul-deadening stretch of Jefferson Blvd that runs through the industrial sector of Culver City, past tinny warehouses and the graffiti-strewn cement banks of Ballona Creek — lies one of the city’s best views.  Not on the street, mind you, but above it, in the Baldwin Hills Scenic Overlook. From atop that unassuming hill, surrounded by fields of yellow flowers and winding garden paths, you can see from Catalina to Compton, from downtown to the Hollywood sign, from Century City to the Inland Empire, and everything in between.

As for how you get up to there, you have two choices — 1: automobile/bike, or 2: PAIN. And by that I mean, a set of steps that are like the brutish, inked-up, just-got-out-of-jail cousin to the Silverlake Stairs — haphazard slabs of stone, spaced unevenly in a dizzying line straight up the face of the mountain. They’re an infernal test of a workout (you know you’re in for a treat when the Yelp reviews say things like “Do not climb these stairs without first downloading ‘Ms. New Bootie’ by Bubba Sparxxx onto your Ipod; thinking of how nice this is going to make your ass look is the only thing that will prevent your imminent collapse.”) But that ordeal only makes the breath-stealing sights up top so much more rewarding.

You’ll notice the overlook doesn’t offer the same pastoral view of the city you’d get from, say, Paseo Miramar. Instead, it serves up a warts-and-all portrait of everything gorgeous and awful about our city — gleaming sun-bright towers and anonymous urban sprawl, nightmarishly teeming freeways and rolling green hills, blue ocean and beige smog, industrial and residential, rich and poor, the effing terrible and the ineffable.

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WHAT: Urban hike with an amazing view
WHEN: Good all year round
WHERE: West Jefferson Blvd, Culver City
$$$: Free

Our favorite jorts-wearing, bearded acoustic folk singer/songwriter-enjoying bohemian community is back at it again, spreading joy and happiness through everything that we here at BoredLA love: music, art, community, and environment.

The Silver Lake Jubilee festival, taking place on May 22nd and 23rd, promises to unite a community once divided by the polarizing quality of Fiery Furnaces’ Blueberry Boat album for at least one weekend.  It will feature a line-up of over 20 musical acts, galleries of local artists, wonderful food from local restaurants, and a slew of surprise performance acts throughout the day.

This event plans to be as eco-friendly as possible and will even feature a children’s village, eco-village, and a temporary xeriscape garden for educational purposes.

The event will happen in a few months, so keep this info in your pocket.  However to pave the way for the festival, the last Wednesday of every month will feature Serenade Sunset at the El Cid (21+).

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WHAT: A Festival!
WHEN: The Weekend of May 22nd and 23rd
WHERE: Between Fountain Ave. and Santa Monica Blvd. on Myra Ave, Silverlake
$$$: General admission: $5, Children under 10 and Senior Citizens: Free

Ok, so — who wants to spend an entire day walking up and down an endless series of concrete stairs?

You do, if you want to see multiple sides of this crazy, beautiful, depraved city all at once.  Back before cars became the primary mode of transportation in LA (like way back in the day), residents of Silverlake/Echo Park had to access their homes via a series of staircases built directly into the hillsides. Because they didn’t have roads, or cars to drive on the roads, which didn’t exist. Shit was rough then, son.

Luckily for us, the past’s necessity has become the present’s excellent-way-to-kill-a-Sunday — part urban adventure, part scavenger hunt. Here’s the map.

You start just off of Sunset Blvd, by one of those Mexican polka-nightclubs that you secretly have always wanted to go into, and head up the Music Box Stairs, made famous for Laurel and Hardy’s inability to get a piano down them.

From here, you spill down across the Junction, and up into the hills where the houses become smaller, hobbit-like, obscured by vines and greenery.  You tramp up along Griffith Park and resist the urge to go into Hard Times Pizza. (Or you don’t; I’m not judging.)  You pass a glass-walled stilt-house where someone told you Scarlett Johansson lives. You wait for Scarlett Johansson to come out. She doesn’t. You ramble onward, along the reservoir and past hidden parks. You dodge crack vials on the steps leading down to a gypsy-camp ensconced off Glendale. You take in views of the city that look like something Terrance Mallick might shoot. You get lost a lot, and feel a strange sense of accomplishment every time you track down an elusive set of steps. “I’m never using a stairmaster again,” you think to yourself.

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WHAT: Urban adventuring in Silverlake
WHEN: Good all year round
WHERE: Start on Vendome St, just south of Sunset
$$$: Free

Check out this unique idea to reinvent city streets through out LA on Sunday mornings: CicLAvia, a group that has previously done this same project in Colombia, successfully if I may add, wants to close down at least three major streets from East LA to West LA on various Sundays this summer and turn them into urban parks. To even attempt to accomplish this plan, they need your vote here. The idea is that they will block off the streets from car traffic from 10am-1pm, only allowing pedestrians, cyclists, families, skateboarders, and anyone else who you would find at a park to enjoy beautiful Sundays mornings outside and in a safe enclosure. They aim to provide this service in areas where parks are extremely lacking, the population is extremely dense, and is near public transportation to allow all to attend. Whether it works or not, it’s a nice idea and feel free to decide for yourself if it deserves your vote! They are currently ranked 53rd and need to be in the top 10 ideas to win the grant.
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WHAT: CicLAvia’s 7-mile Streets to Parks Project
WHEN: Voting ends March 31st
WHERE: Click here to vote!
$$$: Free

“Don’t do it. You’ll get eaten by coyotes.”  This is usually the response I get when I tell people I want to go night-hiking in Griffith Park.  “Nonsense,” I tell them, “I am a large, imposing adult male, not Jessica Simpson’s dog.  Besides, the coyote presence up there is seriously over-reported.”

The first thing I saw when I got there was a coyote.  Cold chillin’ in the parking lot by the merry-go-round. Humans — we only pretend we run this town.

Three times a week for the past few years, the Sierra Club has been leading after-dark hikes up into the mountains between Hollywood and Glendale.  A crowd of 60 or so adventurers gathers in the upper carousel parking lot, where individual groups form based on speed/trail difficulty (I chose a “3+” i.e. “medium” hike.) Then, lead by a central-casting Greek grandfather named Yanni, we were off, twenty silhouettes loping into the darkened hills.

Your eyes adjust to the gloom as you ascend a thin, winding trail, up through what Bob Dylan described as “haunted, frightened trees”, branches stripped by last year’s fires and looking like something from a Tim Burton movie in the moonlight.  You climb under giant fallen logs and bushwhack through overgrowth.  The sound of the freeway gives way to a chorus of chirping crickets and croaking frogs, and then silence — the soundtrack best suited to the spooky majesty of the landscape.  You crest a hill and the entire Los Angeles valley, from downtown to the ocean, opens up below like a massive, glowing cauldron.  “I feel like Batman right now,” you think to myself.  (Seriously, you think that.) Two hours and six miles later, you’re back in the city — sweaty, dusty-streaked and happy.

Don’t be fooled, dear humans; the coyotes know where it’s at.

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WHAT: Night Hike
WHEN: Tues, Wed, Thurs, starting at 6:45 PM
WHERE: Griffith Park — meet at the upper carousel parking lot
$$$: Free

So, as a foodie and locavore and all (I try my best), I’m psyched about the potential of the upcoming Yamashiro Garden Market. Essentially, it’s an evening farmer’s market and “outdoor dining experience” at a historic landmark atop Sycamore Avenue in Hollywood with amazing views of the city. You’ll be able to buy the best local produce from the likes of Apple Sherrill Orchards, Tutti Frutti Farms, hydroponically grown Japanese vegetables, in addition to other goodies like Bulgarini Gelato, Cobbler Mania, BreadMan, J & P Westcoast Seafood, crepes, organic cheeses and more. Then a grill station will be set up for chef’s to provide al fresco market cooking, with items between $4 and $8, and the Pagoda Bar will serve wine, cocktails, and a corkage fee for you to bring your own booze. Sounds cool, right? There will also be live jazz. It takes place every Thursday from 5pm-9pm, starting tomorrow! So this is like one of my dreams for the city (SF has an underground nighttime farmer’s market), but something tells me it will be disappointing. Maybe because they have $2 valet? The farmer’s market should not be a bourgeois affair. Anyway, check it out and let me know how it goes! Worst case scenario: an evening farmer’s market, which is pretty fine by me.

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WHAT: Yamashiro Garden Market
WHEN: Thursdays 5pm-9pm
WHERE: Yamashiro Restaurant 1999 Sycamore Ave., Hollywood 90068
$$$: $2 valet with market validation; assume cash only

UPDATE: Check out pictures from the first week!

Indie classics & 80’s flashbacks grace the screen at the New Beverly Cinema this month.  In operation for over 30 years, it offers refuge from the Hollywood world of 30-second intervals and overly action-packed sequences to provide familiar faces and quotable lines at a fraction of the cost.  Here’s what’s in store for you:

Join guest-programmer, Jason Reitman (best known for his director roles on Juno and Thank You for Smoking) as he highlights such decade decadents as: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and Boogie Nights among others the 19^th-22^nd.

For a nitty-gritty night full of rare 35mm cult/exploitation films and trailers, plus a free DVD raffle, be sure to check out February’s edition of the Grindhouse Film Fest and enjoy: Penitentiary III & Disco Godfather on the 23^rd.   50’s swooners and crooners are proposed a full night of the amazing Judy Holliday the 26^th-27^th with the award-winning, Born Yesterday and fifties-favorite, It Should Happen To You.

Regardless of your mood, this revival house will leave you cinematically-satisfied with enough left in your pocketbook for noodles and sake after the show. Granted, you could fall into full-on nostalgia-arrest, but with every showing a double feature at just $6-$8 a pop, won’t it be worth it?

View the full calendar HERE.

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WHAT: double-feature flashback flicks
WHEN: daily
WHERE: New Beverly Cinema
$: $6-$8, plus free DVD raffles

I know it sounds a little strange, but Machine Project’s Fungi Fest 2010 starts on Saturday.  For a week, the good folks at Machine Project will be celebrating all things mushroom-related (if you want to sound like an expert, the word is mycology).  It seems like the main events are on the 16th and the 21st.

• Saturday, January 16th- Meet at 8 at the Machine Project for fungus-related activities and mushroom flavored Scoops.  Not sure about mushroom ice cream, but the rest sounds fun!
• Monday, January 18th – Public meeting of the Los Angeles Mycological Society at the Museum of Natural History.
• Thursday, January 21st – Mushroom dance and mushroom-themed short films.
• Saturday, January 23rd – Guided mushroom walk in the morning and then harvesting and cooking mushrooms in the evening.

I honestly can’t tell whether this will be awesome or ridiculous, but it’s worth a shot for all the adventurous souls out there.

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WHAT: Fungi Fest 2010
WHEN: January 16th – 23rd
WHERE: All over LA
$$$: Free…I think

Turn your Lazy Sunday into a Funky Happy Sunday with a permaculture digging workshop. Joan Stevens, apparently known to many as Mama Botanica, will lead this workshop. It will involved, “hands-on cardboard sheet mulching workshop and teach us how to plant a ground crop to prepare the soil for winter” and planting a grapefruit and apple tree as well. Tony Moss, a permaculture designer, will give you a tour of the backyard garden and tips on how to create your own! There will be music, dance, and food as well, a raw food lunch to be exact. The menu will include a cauliflower pate, cheese kale chips (made with out cheese), and home made kombucha tea. This four hour workshop will hopefully inspire as well as entertain you, so check it out!

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WHAT: Funky Happy Sunday Permaculture Digging Workshop
WHEN: Sunday, December 13th @ 11am – 3pm
WHERE: New Reality Garden
$$$: $15

It’s only in it’s second year, but it’s the talk of the town: The Unique L.A. Independent Design and Gift Sale is happening again this weekend. It is THE place to buy holiday gifts for all of your friends and family. Not only will you find really great gifts, but you will also be supporting local and independent artists (over 300 to be exact!). Some people may be turned off by the raised entry fee, but it’s only $10 and it gets you unlimited access to both days of the event, a tote bag from Sheperd Fairey’s comany, a free drink ticket, and access to some really fun workshops through out the day. There will be a special “green room” featuring 50 eco-friendly designers, two cafes so you can spend your day with Unique L.A. (you won’t want to leave), and the workshops will be on book-binding, ornaments, and recycled products. And to top it off, a portion of the proceeds will go to LA’s coolest non-profit, 826LA.
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WHAT: Unique Los Angeles Gift Sale
WHEN: Saturday & Sunday, December 5th & 6th @ 11am-6pm
WHERE: California Market Center
$$$: $10

It’s finally here: easy, cheap access to East Los Angeles. I’m seriously ecstatic. To celebrate, Metro’s offering free rides and tons of events at several different stops. Little Tokyo/Arts District will feature live karaoke, a mini street fair with booths from neighboring restaurants and businesses, and plenty of family activities. Union Station will bring Christmas SUPER early (awkwardly so) with a visit from Santa and some carolers. Over at Mariachi Plaza Station, there will of course be live mariachi bands, tons of Latin live music, and Boyle Heights’ first ever block party and street fair. Included in the fair will be tons of delicious food, free giveaways, and local art exhibits.Finally, the East L.A. Civic Center Station will offer live Chicano rock, a farmer’s market, more food booths, family fun, cooking classes, and more. One can easily spend his or her day riding the Gold Line (for free, remember?) and checking out all these free activities highlighting L.A.’s diversity and it’s eagerness to change it’s transportation issues, one line extension at a time!

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WHAT: Metro Gold Line Extension Grand Opening
WHEN: Sunday, November 15th All Day
WHERE: East L.A.
$$$: Free

Going green is even affecting Halloween costumes in a really awesome way. Tavin in Echo Park wants you to join them for wine and a giant selection of costumes made completely out of paper! Each piece is recycled from magazines and newspapers that you know and love, and only bound with duct tape. There will also be a  ton of accessories to choose from, so if you are still with out costume, you’re in luck! Tavin will be open for business 2-6pm today, tomorrow, and on Saturday! Be unique and environmentally-friendly! :)
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WHAT: Tavin Paper Costume Sale
WHEN: Thursday-Saturday, October 29th-31st @ 2PM-7PM
WHERE: Tavin
$$$: Depends on what you buy!

Summer wouldn’t be complete without F Yeah Fest, and seeing as fall is rapidly approaching you might want to catch the summer train one last time for an awesome downtown music festival. The line-up this year is pretty badass- Black Lips, Tim and Eric, No Age, Avi Buffalo, Waves, Mika Miko, Woods, Peanut Butter Wolf, Dan Deacon- just to name a few. Better yet, the festival is to save our state parks, and in fact takes place at the Los Angeles State Historic Park on Spring St. downtown (near Chinatown). Tickets are $20 for the September 5th festival, which starts at 1pm, and $1 will be donated to Homeboy Industries and Harvest of Hope Foundation for Migrant Farm Workers. So come out and end your summer on a high note before all the bullshit begins (or continues if you’re in the working world) and do a lot of good by supporting local musicians, state parks, and migrant farm workers! If you take the metro to the Chinatown station and keep your ticket you can bring it to any drink station at the festival for free water. Most of all- have fun! I know I will ’cause I scored free tickets off KXLU! I know you’re jealous.

WHAT: F Yeah Fest
WHEN: Saturday Sept. 5th 1pm
WHERE: Los Angeles State Historic Park (downtown)
$$$: 20

You know how the old adage goes… You can pick your friends.  You can pick your nose.  But if you pick your friend’s nose, you’ll find out pretty quickly whether or not they’re really your friend.  But another thing you can pick WITH your friends and not have to worry about boundary issues… is fruit!  The freshest of fruit, at that.

PickYourOwn.org has a great list of semi-local farms where you can go and pick up nature’s candy by your very own custom bushel-full.  Most of them seem to be in Leona Valley (about an hour north), but you can also find farms in Oxnard and Pomona.  There are plenty in San Diego and Santa Barbara as well, so you could easily make it a destination experience for a weekend.

If you can stomach your way through their website being entirely in comic sans, then you will find some reals gems.  Especially considering the upcoming fall season and how many pumpkin patches they’ve collected.

Make sure you check their picking tips before you go and when you get back from the farm, you can take your luscious bounty and have a lovely picnic.

PickYourOwn.org

Throw out your annual pass to Six Flags, there’s a new theme park in town. Environmentaland, a new interactive park in Hollywood, is exactly what you think it would be from it’s name. The park is run by Global Inheritance, an eco-friendly group that has created many environmental programs. The park features an “Energy Playground (with Energy Battle Royals!), a Mini-Bin Exhibit and Designing Station, a Planetarium, Desert Mini Golf Course, Recycled Paper Plane Takeoff station, and Alternative Energy Golf Carts”. Sounds cool! And you won’t draw crowds unless you’re keeping things up to date with some great events like art shows, movie nights, fashion shows, awesome new exhibits, and cool happenings. Just last week they had a “Polar Eclipse” event where the contestants would line up at Hollywood & Highland, answer a multiple choice question on global warming, and then arm wrestle a polar bear. Kinda weird, kinda awesome. The winners won tickets to the Teen Choice Awards. Every Wednesday they host a Bigger Picture Movie Night from 7pm-10pm. Then this Saturday, OC and LA artists come together for an art show that will also feature a solar powered music performance.  And then starting on the 16th, it’s Butthugger Fashion Week. For four days, you can donate clothing and then on the 20th, designers can sign up to participate in the 48-hour design contest. Designers can only use materials that have been donated. And of course, there will be a fashion show at the end with prizes galore. So look out for more crazy events happening at the new Environmentaland in Hollywood!
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WHAT: Environmentaland
WHERE: Hollywood & Highland Center
$$$: Free (unless someone hears otherwise…)

Create:Fixate, an art, music, and community oriented organization has supported the careers of artists and the promotion of creative education since its humble beginnings in 2001.  What better way to celebrate local artists, musicians, and community than with a big, loud, art party?  This Saturday, check out their next epic show,“Build”, Exploring Art, Architecture, and Design.  The contributing artists, including David Phillips, Will Koffman, and a boat load of other fantastically interesting and diverse people and contributers, have constructed the “Build” show in a way that encourages activity, collaboration, and creation.  In the Optical Longue you can check out photography, sculpture, multimedia, installations and live painting. There will be video projections, artwork from Environmental Charter High School, fashion and jewelery, live action art, and a mad ton of music from djs and live performers.  They’ve even thought of the children (from 4pm-7pm) and will have a kids creative zone to promote a future full of artists (and patrons). The event features a vegetarian friendly BBQ, a full bar, and street parking (as well as a lot for $10 a car).  The cost of admission doubles after 10pm, so show up before then!
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WHAT: Create:Fixate Presents: “Build”
WHEN: Saturday, June 27th,
Kid’s Zone 4pm-7pm
Mad fun party 4pm-3am
WHERE: Premiere Events Center
$$$: $15 before 10pm, $20 after; $5 suggested donation for Kid’s Zone (12 and younger free before 7)

It’s that time of year again; time for the Venice Eco Fest, which means summer is here. From 10am to 6pm there will be music (lots of bands with names like “the vegan vixens,” art, food, and over 150 eco-exhibits, all trying to get us to live more “greenly” of course. There’s a solar sound stage, Fat Tire beer garden, organic food booths, and a bicycle parade. The goal of the day fest is to honor the earth, promote solutions to global warming, promote the benefits of healthy living and eating, feature local eco-friendly businesses, and to raise awareness in general. Nice weather permitting, this could be a wonderful summer day.

BARHOP: shift from day to night with drinks at the swank Otheroom or the Brig (Kogi is supposed to make an appearance there around 9pm) on Abbot Kinney.

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WHAT: Venice Eco Fest
WHEN: Saturday 27th, 10am-6pm
WHERE: Windward Ave. and Ocean Front Walk
$$$: Free to the public

A corpse flower, that is… The Huntington Library (near Pasadena) has a big, ugly, smelly Amorphophallus titanum blooming in their botanical gardens right now! Normally I wouldn’t recommend going out of your way to smell something that resembles rotting meat, but only 50 such blooms have been recorded in the United States. This is the third time the Huntington has hosted a flowering, and there is no telling how long it will last… It bloomed yesterday, and it could close up soon!

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WHAT: Smell a stinky flower
WHEN: Soon! The Huntington is open from 10:30am to 4:30pm, except Tuesdays
WHERE: The Huntington Library Botanical Gardens
$$$: $10 for students, $15 otherwise

You know that friend you have from the Midwest who just constantly whines about how superficial Los Angeles is? Well, tell him to pack his hiking boots and get his ass out here, because this is as real as it gets.

Last week I grabbed my girlfriend who, being from the San Fernando Valley, believes that hikes are done on pavement and dragged her to Pacific Palisades for a hike in Temescal Canyon Gateway Park. We parked up the road, I sprayed some SPF 50 onto my frail Irish skin, and we hit the trails.

There were creeks! Bugs! Lizards! Catci! All this wonderful flora and fauna, just 15 minutes outside of Santa Monica! There may or may not have been some poisonous fauna too! We had been hiking for scarcely 10 minutes when a couple of women walking in the opposite direction warned us of a rattlesnake ahead. I was thrilled, which is no surprise considering the fact that I am a 6-year-old boy at heart. The GF, on the other hand, was terrified. So we turned around and chose a shadier path, where there would hopefully be fewer snakes basking in the sun…

Red on black, friendly jack. Red on yellow, deadly fellow!

Then who do we run into but this mean looking SOB! Well, he is mean looking, but not much else… That’s a milk snake, which is harmless, and they imitate the coral snake, which is SUPER DEADLY POISONOUS, for defensive purposes. Unfortunately at the time I couldn’t remember the folksy rhyme above, so I started losing it, and my girlfriend turned our hike into a trail running session when she sprinted past the snake… And for another 100 yards, just for good measure.

After that encounter we decided to return to the luxuries of modern civilization, but that’s not to say we didn’t have fun. It’s a beautiful park with incredible views and well-maintained trails that is so close to the city it is difficult to believe. Literally. I tried, and it almost blew my mind. So if you’ve got a hankerin’ to get out of the concrete jungle and into a real one, head on over to Temescal Canyon… Open everday, dawn to dusk.

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WHAT: Hiking in Pacific Palisades
WHEN: Whenever… Everyday, as long as it’s light out
WHERE: Temescal Canyon Gateway Park
$$$: Free parking on the street, or $5 for the park lot… Oh, and some Yelpers mentioned that if you roll through the stop sign in the park lot you’ll get stung with a $125 ticket via USPS a week later!