The Twilight Dance Series at the Santa Monica Pier is the most fun you will ever have ignoring a band. This is not to say that the bands aren’t worth your attention (track down Kokono #1, a Congolose dance-trance outfit that rocked the stage earlier this month.) But they’re up on the pier, and the real action is down in the sand…

As the sun sinks, the beach becomes checkerboarded with picnic blankets as revelers stake their claims. Sangria gets sipped from plastic cups; tendrils of sweet smoke drift past, hinting that your neighbors may be engaging in the deplorable practice of smoking marijuana; laughter flows. Unlike the Hollywood Bowl, where the sound-system overpowers conversation and the rows of seats provide a semblance of privacy, the Twilight series seems almost designed to help you meet the people around you. Pretty soon, you’re surrounded by no-longer-strangers and doing the merrily unsteady barefoot-in-the-sand dance.

This Thursday, they’ll be featuring Kailash Kher, an Indian pop-folk singer who fills stadiums back on his native subcontinent despite vaguely resembling the little brother in Spy Kids. It’s spacey, kick-off-your-shoes music, a nice fit for a setting lit by the lights of a ferris wheel. Get there early, the beach fills up quick.

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WHAT: Weekly concert series on the beach
WHEN: Thursday evenings, 7 pm
WHERE: The Santa Monica Pier
$$$: Free

The Venice Beach Carnevale will not be televised. Nor will it actually be held in Venice; apparently, tonight’s hedonistic costume contest/dance-party/annual gathering of LA’s freaky people has somehow gotten too insane for the uptight streets of Venice Beach and has been moved to a secret location around Jefferson/Sepulveda. (If this were a grindhouse movie, the announcer would now solemnly intone: “It‘s a party so wild they had to move it to Culver City… where life is cheap!”)

Ok, let’s take a step back and think about this for a moment — how, exactly, does one get kicked out of Venice? Have you been there lately? You could walk around with a severed head and tourists would still ask to take pictures with you. Last time I was hanging out on the boardwalk, a guy in a leopard-print vest and bootie-shorts tried to sell me some meth, as well as (I am not making this up), a live, 5-foot python. Anyway so now I’ve got all this meth and a live python and my friends no longer like to come over. Point that I’m making here, people, it takes a lot to get your ass 86′d from Venice Beach. This event deserves your consideration.

Will there be a full-size intergalactic pirate ship known as the Space Wench to gallivant around? There will be. Will there be floor-shaking beats from the likes of Fatfinger, Todd Spero, and divaDanielle (who I’ve pimped so many times on this site, people are are going to sooner or later think I’m involved in some kind of payola scheme?) Bet your ass. Will there be a masquerade costume contest that lands somewhere between Salvador Dali and Eyes Wide Shut? Most definitely. Will there be a certain amount of public nudity? Yes ma’am. Will there be acrobats and fire performers and go-go dancers? What do you think this is, the Republican National Convention? (Ok, bad example.) Just remember to come in costume — “exotic and erotic attire encouraged.”

And if you want to get in, RSVP here today to get the address and final details for tonight.

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WHAT: Carnevale masquerade party
WHEN: Saturday June 5th, 8:30 PM – 3:30 AM
WHERE: Culver City (RSVP to get address)
$$$: $15 (or $35 for VIP/open bar)

Because what’s more punk rock than romping around the notoriously kitschy redwood forest themed bar, Bigfoot Lodge? Hanging out in an alley contemplating disestablishmentarian notions you say? Poppycock! (Or perhaps you’ve simply become bored that your only other social options on Tuesdays are being stuck in Hollywood, pretending to be pretentious. Bleh! That’s not punk rock at all!)

Starting this Tuesday, Some Nerve, the new bi-weekly punk rock n’ roll themed night invites you to take a few hours off from your anarchy planning to go have fun dancing around with Smokey The Bear while drinking cheap Colt 45. They’re on special (when are they not?) along with other drinks sure to unleash your wilderness rock monster. The various music providers of the evening (commonly referred to as “DJs”) include Helleion, Jacob Safari, and TNT, along with the roaming photographic stylings of Shadowscene, so don’t forget to get that studded leather jacket and mohawk in tip top shape!

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WHAT: Some Nerve punk rock n’ roll party
WHEN: Tuesday, June 1st – 9pm – 2am
WHERE: The Bigfoot Lodge, 3172 Los Feliz Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90039
$$$: Free!!!

Two years ago, a gang of spirited young hooligans armed with MP3 players invaded Mann’s Chinese Theater to hold a very public dance-party. The invasion started quietly, done in plain sight, everyone simply mingling and pretending to examine celebrity handprints outside… until 10:07 PM, when everyone busted out earphones like gunslingers in a Robert Rodriguez movie and danced their ass off to whatever was on their Ipod — a silent, joyous collision between flash-mob and discotheque. There was also a conga-line at one point.

Tourists were mystified. Employees were stymied. Security was unable to stop laughing, even as they escorted us out. Undeterred, the party continued, West Side Story-style, down to Hollywood and Highland, where street performers, celebrity impersonators, and random passerby joined in on the festivities. (A guest appearance was made by several stone-faced, video-camera-brandishing members of the LAPD.) Footage of all this epic-ness is available right here.

Anyway — this year, rather than hold our party at some Hollywood tourist trap, we’re instead going for a prized LA institution, something this city holds near and dear, a place where regular folks go to peacefully shop, dine and take trolley-rides. That’s right, kids: we’re gonna storm The Grove.

Meet-up point is in front of Pacific 14 Movie Theater, by the fountains. Get there by 10 PM. Come ready to boogie in public (do what you need to do here, guys.) Mingle, act normal, do not attract attention from civilians. Headphones go in at exactly 10:07 PM, and then we dance like lunatics until security shows us out, at which point we respectfully go find a new “dance floor” elsewhere and repeat.  Afterparty at The Kibitz Room bar at Canter’s.

RSVP on Facebook here.

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WHAT: Mobile Dance-Club Party
WHEN: Friday, June 18th — dancing starts at 10:07 PM, sharp
WHERE: The Grove, in front of movie theater
$$$: Free

Do you ever find yourself getting nostalgic for stuff that never happened to you?  Be honest — when the song “American Woman” by The Guess Who comes on your car radio, do you imagine yourself in 1971, cruising along in a t-top Camaro with summer winds blowing through your feathered hair? Do you watch Mad Men and secretly long for a day when it was appropriate to drink multiple martinis at work? Ever seen an old gangster flick and then wondered about the logistics of buying a Tommy-gun? (Spoiler alert: they’re legal!)

If you answered “yes” to any of those, have I got the place for you: The Cicada Club, a frozen-in-time throwback to the swing era, situated in the art-deco sumptuousness of the Oviatt Building on Olive St. This place has a 1940’s ambiance so all consuming, it renders time machines obsolete.

Originally built, according to the website, in 1928 as a “top-of-the-line haberdashery” (no doubt the envy of all those other wack-ass haberdasheries frontin’ up in the 213 at the time), the club features live big-band music every Sunday night, a sprung-wood floor populated by some of the most graceful swing-dancers you’ll ever lay eyes on, and a gin menu that could make W.C. Fields weep in ecstasy. (They also do a fixed-price dinner, but it’s A: reportedly not that great, B: overpriced at $50 per person, and C: requires you to interact with the Cicada waiters, who I generally found to be grouchy ass-clowns.)

My advice: skip the food, grab a sloe-gin fizz, and find someone to swing with. It doesn’t matter if you’re any good; I have houseplants that are better dancers than some of the people out on that floor. (In fact, some of those people’s names rhyme with “Me.”) But that’s the wonderful thing about this place — it’s utterly egalitarian. The crowd ranges from early 20’s to late 60’s; black guys in Andre 3000 outfits rub shoulders with white dudes in pin-stripe suits and Asian girls in evening gowns. Even the 12-piece orchestra is delightfully all over the map, featuring someone who looks like a well-fed old rabbi on the bass, a young fella in a do-rag on the clarinet, a heart-stoppingly beautiful redhead trumpet player, and a Morgan Freeman lookalike for a front-man who I believe possesses the most genuinely joyful smile I’ve ever seen on a human being.

Keep in mind: the other thing that truly unites the crowd (besides a love of all things post-war) is the dress code. Cicada Club requires a jacket/tie/dress shoes for guys and evening gowns for gals — dress like you were going to The Edison, in other words. And remember, the next time you find yourself wishing you were alive in an era when the drinks were two-fisted, the music was big, the dames were classy and the guys were… well, off fighting Hitler for the most part — this is the place you come.

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WHAT: Ultra-immersive 1940’s swing-dancing club
WHEN: Sunday nights, 6PM – 11 PM
WHERE: 617 South Olive Street
$$$: $10’s at the door, $8-$12 a drink

Culver City is decadent and depraved! Well, no, that’s not entirely true, it’s actually kind of New Jersey suburb-ish and really rather pleasant… but on May 8th, there’s an underground festival going on that will set those earlier words in stone. That’s when the Mystikal Misfits, a hardy tribe of LA-based Burning Man fanatics, are throwing COLLECTION! – a dance party that promises such high levels of giddy debauchery, anyone who hopes to someday have a political career should avoid getting photographed there.

There will be mysterious cocktails.  There will be fire-dancing. There will be adorable, scantily-clad boys and girls running around in “Mad Max” gear and neon fur.  There will be a giant Twister board, for those of you who need a socially acceptable reason to get in compromising positions with aforementioned adorables. There will be amazing house and electro DJ’s, headlined by DivaDanielle tag-teaming with Todd Spero, spinning the kind of beats that will later have your doctor admonishing you to include less funkiness in your diet. There will be an aromatherapy booth, and classy dames selling cigarettes (not in the aromatherapy booth.) It’s being held at Mission Control, adjacent to Jefferson Ave and the 405, the exact building address of which is being kept under wraps until the night of the party — RSVP on the Facebook page to get all the details.

Culver City will never know what hit it.

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WHAT: Underground Burning Man dance party
WHEN: Saturday, May 8th, 9PM – 4 AM
WHERE: Mission Control
$$$: $15

Are you already feeling nostalgic for The Specials’ triumphant comeback performance at Coachella last weekend (or are one of those poor souls who missed it entirely, because you couldn’t afford a ticket/had other plans/were actually at Coachella but were busy having a mescaline-fueled existential meltdown inside a Port-a-John?)  Fear not — because Friday nights at La Cita are all about the Punky Reggae Party.  Housed in slow-slung joint with brothel-like lighting and arguably the sweatiest dance floor in downtown, La Cita’s weekend start-up shindig is where you go when you want to unashamedly skank to some Madness, Fishbone, The Sex Pistols, Sister Nancy, and of course, our dearly reunited Specials.  If the word “penance” can be used in relation to anything this much fun, consider it penance for all those terrible third-wave ska-punk albums you bought in the mid-90’s. (Get there early, this place fills up fast.)

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WHAT: Punky Reggae Party
WHEN: Friday Nights, 9 PM-2 AM
WHERE: La Cita
$$$: Free before 11 PM, $5 after

You’ve been staring at that little box on your calendar that reads “Sunday, April 25th” with a wish in your heart that just keeps nagging for an excuse to break out that can of aqua net, glitter tights, and those fun vintage 80’s clothes lurking in your closet that you haven’t quite had the nerve for yet. Taint that pure churchy glow that you were prancing around all day with by going to La Cita downtown for Erotic City! This week they’re having a live performance from Josie Cotton who will be performing her classics from the Valley Girl soundtrack along with some new material. Every week they have $3 brew, $4 well drink specials and entry is free, but be sure to RSVP.

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WHAT: Erotic City with Josie Cotton
WHEN: Sunday, April 25, 9:30pm – 2am
WHERE: La Cita Bar, 336 Hill Street, DTLA 90013
$$$: FREE all night long

This Sunday (TONIGHT, love), whether you are attempting a rather leisurely comedown from the weekend desert madness or, rather, to make up for the fact that you may have just missed the best concert of your life, rest assured, I have just the cure.

Guaranteeing the latest of Vampire Weekend greatness, Miike Snow remixes, and a few oldies, but goodies (Joy Division-style), the completely FREE White Bunny Disco event is invading (the upstairs lounge of) the Mountain Bar in the best way possible.  Just south of your eastsider roots, park easily on Broadway or Hill and follow the red paper lanterns to feng shui central (aka: Gin Ling Way).

Situated within one of Chinatown’s oldest restaurant-turned watering holes, expect ladies & gents exhibiting a diverse mix of artistic fanfare, original and reasonably-priced drinks (heavy pour alert!), dancing delight inspired by resident djs Knyfeprty and J Man, and only the best in party photographers to, naturally, capture it all on film.  Beware of the melting walls, possible restroom confusion (“G” is for gentlemen, NOT girls, yo), and be sure to end the night respectively with some walnut shrimp at the night-owl friendly Full House Chinese Restaurant (open ‘til 3am), located just within stumbling distance.

See?   Bunnies after Easter really aren’t a faux pas after all.

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WHAT: White Bunny Disco
WHEN: THIS Sunday, April 18th 10pm-2am
WHERE: 475 Gin Ling Way (& Bamboo Lane) in Chinatown
$$$: FREE all night long

Hold your breath and dive – dive – dive!  In the truest sense of the term, Jumbo’s Clown Room is a dive bar.  On Hollywood Boulevard near Thai-Town Jumbo’s is a skeazy little bikini bar (essentially a strip club where no one gets naked) with nothing to prove.

The drinks here are nothing special; just your run of the mill mixed drinks and bud light on tap.  What is special about Jumbo’s is something intangible.  On the surface it is a tiny, dirty, seedy strip bar, but when you are inside nothing about it feels that way.  The staff

The Jumbo's Girls do The Time Warp

and the dancing girls are extremely warm and friendly, they seem to really just want you to have a fun time.  I have only been to Jumbo’s in mixed company and the ladies always have as just as much fun as the fellas.

The thing about Jumbo’s Clown Room is you either get it or you don’t.  Do you get it?  Bring some ones and  head to the Clown Room to find out.

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WHAT: Friendly burlesque dancers cultivate your good time.
WHEN: Daily till 2am
WHERE: Jumbo’s Clown Room
$$: $6 for a can of beer, bring some cash to tip.

“There’s something wrong with my ass — I need to shake it.”  This was the bound-for-immortality quote my friend delivered to me as we headed out to a Shade party last summer. And if there is ever a better reason to shake your ass in a grassy park on a Saturday afternoon, I have yet to find it.

The brainchild of LA-based DJ’s DivaDanielle and Porter Tinsley, Shade is a once-a-month “day party”, kicking off this Saturday from noon til sunset  in Woodley Park. It’s the kind of place where you’ll find yourself drinking strange libations with friendly strangers on picnic blankets in the afternoon sun; where you can go ballistic with squirt-guns during impromptu water-fights; where you can try your hand at hula-hooping or spinning poi (being met with, if you’re anything like me, hilariously mixed results); where you’ll watch silk-rope acrobats slowly gyrate in the trees, like an NSFW Disney cartoon; where DJ’s you’d normally have to venture out deep into clubland (or into Burning Man) to find, are happily spinning funky house and ghetto-tech to their hearts’ content. It’s one of those things that reminds out-of-towners why they moved to LA, and reminds locals why they love it here (and for me, why I ever got into event-blogging in the first place.) It’s a secret too good to keep.

Summer’s here. Stop dilly-dallying. Go shake it.

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WHAT: Daytime dance party in the park
WHEN: Once a month, Saturdays from noon til sunset
WHERE: Woodley Park
$$$: Free

I don’t know about you, but spring is my favorite time of year.  Never-mind the fact it means my birthday is right around the corner and… it sets my mind in a constant state of cupcake-dreaming bliss—springtime means the air is clean, the weather is warmer, and brightly colored petals are blooming all around, including the much-awaited cherry blossom trees.  Finally getting the credit they deserve, LA is celebrating these Japanese beauties April 10^th-11^th in the Little Tokyo Arts District with the annual Cherry Blossom Festival.

Dance the day away with some traditional Odori dancing in the street (San Pedro St., to be exact), challenge someone to a strategic-frenzy game of GO, and perfect your horse stance watching the live presentations in the Martial Arts Arena.   New for this year is the J-Pop Stage, featuring anime-pop music & a lolita fashion show, a showing (4 times daily) of the film-festival favorite: Only The Brave, and (an obviously needed addition), a beer & sake garden.  Food-wise, expect a large assortment of Hawaiian favorites (smoothies, please!), as well as yummy sushi and noodle selections from Japan Bistro.

This is also the perfect time to reacquaint yourself with the (too-often forgotten) Japanese American National Museum and the Geffen Contemporary at MOCA, which are literally right next door.

Whatever brings you out, this vastly cultural, FREE event definitely tops the list in terms of entertainment-value.  Engaging over 45,000 guests last year, there are bound to be a few recreational activities to keep you busy and out of mischief.  Well…busy, at least.  I’ll leave the mischief-decision up to you.

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WHAT: Cherry Blossom Festival
WHEN: Saturday, April 10th: 10:30am-6:30pm & Sunday, April 11th: 10:30am-5pm
WHERE: Little Tokyo Arts District (1st & Alameda downtown)
$$$: FREE!

This weekend, DrinkEatPlay gives you a way to drink as much as humanly possible while also maintaining a bit of class.

The LA Sake Festival is in its 2^nd year offering over 100 types of imported sake to sip and sample in every flavor, filter, and variety possible.  If you’re new in the sake game, introductory classes will be offered to help you bypass the sake-bomb phase.  For you connoisseurs, take advantage of the OPEN BAR mixologists to create a new version of your specialty sake cocktail, whether it be the oh-so-popular saketini or (for you intrepid souls) the tamagozake: the Japanese answer to eggnog.

It’s all happening this Saturday night, March 27^th at the Renaissance Hollywood Hotel.  Promising a bit of a Vegas vibe in a relaxed, yet upscale setting; this may just be your lucky night. Go organic or unfiltered, munch on some pairing-appropriate (or not so much) sushi roll and spicy noodles, and be sure to top off the night with a visit to the authentic karaoke booth and give the people what they want with a saucy rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody.

Oh!  And don’t let the $50 price tag scare you away.  Sign up for FREE with Goldstar.com and get twenty bucks off the all-inclusive door price.  Kampai!

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WHAT: LA Sake Festival
WHERE: Renaissance Hollywood Hotel
WHEN: Saturday, March 27th, 8pM-11PM
$$$: $50 ($30 if you sign up with Goldstar.com)

Ladies and Gentlemen – a very exciting announcement. We at BoredLA just received word of the grand opening of The Greatest Party ever. Take a moment to digest this phenomenal news. Once you have, continue reading:

If you like getting your groove on (and you do, admit it), then you need to make a point to check out the newest dance factory in Hollywood. Opening tomorrow night, Fridays at Hwood promises a collection of the areas greatest DJs to get your booty shaking – some electric combination of indie, 90s, punk, electro, rock… as well as “A TRIO OF SUPER HOMIES TO COMPLETE VOLTRON.” Those capital letters weren’t a mistake, by the way! There’s also talk of a “secret guest,” which is always exciting. As usual – arrive early or miss out. This is bound to be a big night, so don’t wake up on Saturday kicking yourself for missing all the action.

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WHAT: Fridays at Hwood
WHEN: 9:30 p.m. until… who knows! (Probably 2 a.m.)
WHERE: The corner of Orange and Hollywood Blvd.
$$$: Free ninety-nine.

As if you need another reason to trek over to Highland Park’s bat-obsessed Little Cave – a place that looks like something Jack Skellington might own if he grew up in East LA and became a nightlife entrepreneur — Thursday nights are now all about Rehab and Free Tacos. (The “Rehab” part means absolutely zip, aside from a jab at the clientele’s predilection for liquid excess.)

For all the talk about the “diversity” of LA after hours, Rehab is the real deal — the crowd is a merry mixture of Salvadorian goths, glam-punk Asians, Dominican hipsters with “Boondocks” afros, and at least three nerdy white dudes who seem to frequent the same hoody shop. (Four if you count me.) DJ JesC keeps the sounds as far-ranging as the sights, with Love and Rockets and MGMT rubbing elbows with George Clinton and Ice Cube.

And the tacos?  You get what you pay for, but they’re still a damn sight better than the lukewarm sadness they serve up over at The Gold Room. To the batcave!

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WHAT: Eclectic weekly shindig (with gratis carne asada)
WHEN: Thursdays, 9 PM – 2 AM
WHERE: Little Cave
$$$: $5 for a pint of Shock Top

Break out your leopard print, top hats, and faux fur for this one because Friday night is all about the vixens and vamps at the downtown Venus in Furs & Femme Fatale party.  This Muzezon, Inc. journey, taking you back a few decades, will feature a runway show with hair and makeup by Hairroin Salon, body art by No.YTK, and live femme fatale models strutting their stuff to the best indie/electro beats by dj’s: Notorious Jen and Henry Strange.  Featured artwork includes: Pingping paintings, (pop-anime girly art), and Michelle Hinch photography, (recent contributor to Marie Claire: Tokyo), amongst other modern-day-heroine presentations.  Don’t miss the chance to take part in this Velvet Underground-inspired charade!  Donations are accepted at the door (CASH only!) in support of Haiti relief efforts, libations will be flowing, and there is a $5 secure parking lot from which a complimentary shuttle will escort you to all the fatale fun.

Calling all you jazz cats, and zoot-suit-wearing hipsters.  Saturday, we celebrate the yin to the femme fatale’s yang at the: Ode to the Lounge Lizard-A Cocktail Napkin Art Invitational.  Hosted by the E3rd Lounge in the heart of the downtown LA Arts District, this is second in the monthly Jerico Woggon-presented event series.  $10 gets you in the door, $5 with a shared recession tale (awesome = getting a discount to vent), and FREE admission will be granted to anyone brave enough to show up in an actual lizard costume (pictures, please!).  If this isn’t enough to draw you out already, there is plenty more where that came from: a blacklight art installation by Woggon himself, live painting by E3rd resident artist (and Little Tokyo art darling), Emmeric Konrad, and everything necessary to create your own cocktail napkin art for selling, trade, or a take-home flashback souvenir.

Moral of the story?  Whichever is truly the Leader of the Pack, both guarantee to be a swingin’ good time.

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WHAT: Venus in Furs & Femme Fatale & Ode to the Lounge Lizard
WHEN: Friday, Feb. 26th 9pm-4am & Saturday, Feb. 27th, 8pm-2am
WHERE: Catalyst Artist Collective (LOFT) & E3rd Lounge
$$$: Haiti relief donation-$10, CASH ONLY

According to Berlin-native and house-producer, DJ KAOS, the answer is YES!  In a rare U.S. appearance this Saturday night at the Chase Loft Series-February Edition, the dj heavyweight promises to keep the crowd movin and groovin’ until the wee hours to his own version of Chicago-inspired house and disco beats.

Presented by The Chase, EVFA, and MEO, KAOS will be joined by rockin’ resident dj’s: JaseFromOuterSpace and Klassique at Junglerush, a hidden indoor/outdoor venue perfect for late-night dalliances or just a fun night out of the oh-so-predictable Hollywood scene. True to its downtown roots and promotional prowess, this event is one not to be missed.

Annd….that’s not all!  The recession-style OPEN BAR will keep the conversation flowing, not to mention your glass full for a mere $15 until 11pm and $20 thereafter.  I don’t know how much YOU typically spend on cocktails a night, but let me tell you, this is a STEAL in my drink-infused world.

Whether this inspires you late-nighters to at least consider making it in the door before the price increase or you still run a little late due to a last-minute addition to the perfect outfit, $5 more is a small price to pay for fun on the run, so I say let the rationalization takes its natural course. After all, the party will be poppin’ ‘til 3am and if Italians really do do it better, it will be well worth the wait.

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WHAT: Chase Loft Series-February Edition
WHEN: Saturday, Feb. 20th, 10pm-3am
WHERE: Junglerush/EVFA, 542 S Alameda (Cross St. Palmetto)
$$: $15 before 11pm, $20 after with open bar, CASH ONLY

We post about the boys of ishowmyself a lot and their resident dance club- Temporary Spaces, but they do throw a good dance party if you’re looking for one. This Saturday should be no different, at their weekly “BIG” Saturdays at their new TS2 (Temporary Spaces 2) location on Melrose. I have yet to try out the new location, but I thoroughly enjoyed myself a time or two at the old location on Fountain Ave. so I have no reason to believe this would be any different. In fact, the way @iSHOWMYSELF twitters about it I would think it would be even better. It’s always free entry and there’s usually a drink special: this week it’s $5 drinks until 11pm and cheap Mexican food all night. I.D.E.A., LeDISKO, and Sean Patrick are also responsible for these dance nights.  If you can’t make it out this weekend, try it the next. Last weekend was ’90s night and I sort of really wish I had come out. I hear one of the boys was wearing puka shells?

WHAT: BIG Saturdays at Temporary Spaces
WHEN: Saturday 10pm-2am; every Saturday
WHERE: 4658 Melrose Ave (at Ardmore)
$$$: free entry; $5 drinks before 11pm

There you are. Sitting at your computer or smart phone. Racking your brain for something to do tomorrow night. There’s that party that your friend from high school’s second cousin is throwing in their apartment complex that will no doubt get busted at 11:30, and since you’re not on the inner circle of friends, you’ll be thrown out into the cold to drink the can of PBR you stole on the way out while listening to the radio, possibly crying. That doesn’t sound fun at all. Take my advice, start the new decade with something adventurous and go do something on this list!

GOOD HARD TIMES ART & MUSIC FESTIVAL

The Hear Gallery, Blow Up LA, and Automatico are teaming up with an absurdly crammed lineup of musicians, djs, artists, video installations, live art, catering, free giveaways from some of the sponsors, topped off with an open bar with admission from 8pm – 2am. There’s so much happening, I feel it’s wrong to highlight any one aspect. Just do yourself a favor and click that rsvp link (That one. Right there. Or the one just below this.) and look yourself.

WHAT: Good Hard Times NYE 2010
WHEN: 8pm – 5am
WHERE: Loft 265, 265 S. Main St. @ 3rd St.. 90012 (enter through back alley)
$$$: 21+: $25 8pm-2am, $15 8pm-11pm w/rsvp, $10 2am-5am
18+: $10 all night

THE STANDARD’S NEW YEAR’S EVE MASQUERADE PARTY

Poolside at The Standard Hollywood, ring in the new year with a performance from Fool’s Gold, an 11 piece eclectic Afro-pop band, DJs Prince Language, Asa Ransom, Valida, and DJ Pubes. Included in the $30 presale ticket price is a comlimentary champangne toast at midnight, with $5 Red Stripe specials all night. The perfect opportunity to bust out that unloved Mardi Gras mask from the back of your closet and go make out with strangers.

WHAT: New Year’s Eve Masquerade Party
WHEN: 7pm – 2am
WHERE: The Standard Hollywood, 8300 Sunset Blvd., 90069
$$$: $30 presale here, $40 day of

NYEROX ‘09

Dub Frequency and URB magazine are taking over The Roxy on Sunset, with a countdown (Hooray! Wait, isn’t everyone doing that?) and DJs like DJ Skee, Moke Posner, Dude Royal, and more. Sounds like a dance party! General admission tickets are $30, all you can drink well and beer tickets are $55, all you can drink premium tickets $100.

WHAT: NYEROX ‘09
WHEN: 9pm – 2am
WHERE: The Roxy, 9009 W. Sunset Blvd, West Hollywood
$$$: $30+

NEW YEAR’S EVE AT THE ROOSEVELT

If you’ve got the $140 for tickets, this sounds glamtamerous. A performance from Pharacyde, DJ Grandmaster Flash amongst others, and an erotic water ballet performance! The party is going to encompass the entire property, including the pool and all the rooms, with 4 separate stages set up, and a huge balloon drop at midnight. Entrance includes the open bar from 9pm -11pm. Be sure to get your tickets fast, they’re (allegedly) almost sold out.

WHAT: New Year’s Eve 2010
WHEN: 9pm – 3am
WHERE: The Roosevelt Hotel, 7000 Hollywood Blvd., 90028
$$$: $140

VENDETTA NEW YEAR’S EVE

Escape the new millenium and party like it’s 1920 with this prohibition era mobster themed party brought to you by LADEAD. With an eclectic mix of industrial, swing, electro, and jazz music coming from the DJs, this is sure to be the ultimate haunt for all you old school gangster types looking for a flapper to call your own. $20 for general entry at the door, $150 for VIP w/open bar and blackjack with suicidegirl dealers ($100 presale if you’re quick).

WHAT: Vendetta New Year’s Eve
WHEN: 9pm – 3am
WHERE: The Monte Cristo, 3100 Wilshire Blvd,  90005
$$$: $20 general admission/$150 vip

RED BULL NEW YEAR NO LIMITS

Then, of course if you’re not into all this club stuff and want to see someone possibly be maimed/dead by a crazy Evil Knievel stunt, Red Bull is sponsoring Travis Pastrana in his attempt to break the world record for longest jump over water down at the Pine Avenue Pier in Long Beach. The event’s free, but the parking may be a nightmare. Here’s a little assistance from Red Bull.

WHAT: Red Bull New Year No Limits
WHEN: 9pm is jump time
WHERE: Rainbow Harbor, Pine Avenue and Shoreline Drive, Long Beach, CA 90802
$$$: Free! $10 parking in most lots

Bon voyage, dear 2009! You were quite a kick in the pants. Should you feel like kicking your short term memory in the pants for the night, head on down to ye old Alvarado House in Echo Park tonight for an all night dance under sheets, stars, and low basement ceilings rager. Brought to you by the Hang The DJs crew, these parties do not disappoint. Outside is a tented backyard with video projections and Star Wars sheets, inside is a somewhat ramshackle house where you’d sooner assume to see haunted portraits of former owners rather than 100 club kids smarmily dancing and pounding on the ceiling.

This installment features DJs Ana Calderon, Knyfeprty, Aaron Castle amongst others, along with (more) free Colt 45 10 – midnight, cash bar the rest of the night. Be sure to bundle up with lots of layers since it’s primarily outdoors, however the indoor dance room does get pretty sweaty. And don’t plan on going to that early morning church service tomorrow. They look down on hangovers, so I hear.

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WHAT: HTDJs End Of Year Party
WHEN: Saturday, December 26th, 10pm – 4am
WHERE: The Alvarado House, 1027 N. Alvarado St., Echo Park 90026
$$$: $5